Last week the baby making kit arrived in the mail; two boxes from a specialty pharmacy filled with four different types of hormonal drugs and lots of needles to go with them. Up until this point in my life I have had needle phobia and could not stomach the idea of having to inject myself ever, let alone once an maybe more times a day.
The first injection was the worst. I did as the nurse said, pinched my belly fat, put the needle on my skin and then wanted to throw up. I just couldn't do it. I called for Charles to help, but he was on a phone call and wouldn't be done soon. I was still pinching my skin. I started and stopped a couple more times, skin still pinched. Then finally I just turned away and plunged. Sure it stung and was ooogy, but I got passed it, although a bit light headed. And I left myself a vicious bruise that is still there four days later...whoops...dont pinch your skin for 15 mins unless you want bruises...mkay?
Now I am a pro.
Slight hesitation the second morning, but now it is a breeze not even slightly uncomfortable, and even better no marks :) I know the needle gauge gets bigger for the next shots, but at this point I say to my needle fear...Bring it! I no longer fear your steely prick.
So far so good. Not feeling any real adverse effects from the drugs either other than possibly being a bit more sluggish in the head than usual (couldn't manage to open a single door the right way the first time last week).
As we get closer to the retrieval and implantation in about 2 weeks, the reality that the journey I have been on for the last 5 years might actually pay off in motherhood excites and scares me. But I know now that it will happen and when it does I will have the added benefit of being able to tell my child how much they really were wanted, and even exactly how they were made. No embarrassing "mommy and daddy got naked" stories for our Baby G! Oh no more like "Once upon a time there was this lonely petri dish...."
4 comments:
Beautiful Athena! I'm so excited for you guys and your journey ahead. Continue to be the brave woman you are and it WILL happen for you! <3<3<3
Ooh, how exciting, Athena! We are fellow IVF-ers. Countless tests, "procedures," two IVFs and 3 kids later, it is definitely worth it. We, too, giggle about the easy-peasy baby-makin' explanation... I'm looking forward to following your journey!
I am very excited for you. The sluggish brain is normal for maternity hormones - we often call it 'Mommy Brain', and it never really goes away - I have learned to make more lists for myself. My 4 yr old son and my soon to be born son were not IF but we did struggle to conceive this one and I miscarried one a year ago. I used ovulation test strips and charting (as you say, not very sexy). I can tell you it is ALL worth it. Also, don't let anyone make you feel like you are 'starting late' or are old. I will be 41 when this child arrives. - Robin C
Good luck Athena! I'm so happy for you and Charles that you have a promising option!
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